The infinite playlist
by PinkLemonadeandLove02
Summary: Sometimes the hetalia characters forget that they're humans too but when life and love makes it hard for them go on they look to eachother for support. In 'the infinite playlist' a series of songs tells the stories of the couples of hetalia. WARNING: some nyotalia characters.


_'For the first time' by The Script_

_couple: AlfredxJanina (AmericaxFem!Lithuania)_

* * *

The world of being a country is exciting, sad, funny, lonely. It could make a person high on laughter or crash and burn. How is that the men and women of each country are able to stay confined in their own world without losing their humanity. From Alfred F. Jones, it was Janina. She was his rock, his foundation. He kept a front to the other nations but with her it was all gone. He could cry into her lap or laugh with her presence. There were others before her but he promised himself, and secretly to her, that she would be his last.

To Janina Laurinaitis there was no other man she would rather have than Alfred himself. The years spent abused and hurt in the cold of Russia was enough to send her to suicide. She considered it but after spending eleven years with America there was just no point in it. She wanted to live. To be there for America through it all. Even if it ment hurting herself. How could she tell the man she loved that she feared being torn back into Russia? How? What could he possibly do? None of that mattered. If she could spend one more night with America that would be enough to give her hope for the rest of her life.

* * *

"Why didn't you tell me you were afraid?" he asked her. His blue eyes were stunned with pain. Janina looked to her feet and stuffed her hands in the pockets of her apron. She bit her trembling lower lip to avoid the impending tears. She turned her back to him and began to frantically wipe the tears she could not hold back. Alfred tried to embrace her but she pushed him away. She didn't want him to see her like this. The only time he ever saw her like this was when they separated the first time, just before he needed her the most. He wasn't mad then, it wasn't he fault. But now, when he could do something about it, she didn't even want him to touch her. How dare she!?

"Don't touch me. I'm dirty" she choked. Dirty? What did she mean? Was there something below the mature and motherly face she wore?

"I don't think you...could you please...tell me what you're afraid of" he begged. She turned to him with her green eyes glistening over. She took her apron off and placed it on the counter. With the sleeve of her shirt she wiped her eyes.

"There is nothing I am afraid of. Please, let's not continue this conversation" she sniffed. That's it! He angrily hit the marble counter with his fist, accidently breaking off a corner. She flinched but stood her ground. Even if he was terrifying her right now, she would not back down from her argument.

"God damnit! How the hell can I help you if you won't let me?!" he yelled. She opened her mouth to say something but seeing him storm from their house told her it was best to remain silent.

* * *

He stormed the wet paved streets of their neighborhood. He thought back to their meeting, their separation and everything they had been through together. At this point, wouldn't they have some level of trust amongst eachother? They should but obviously since Janina wouldn't open her damn mouth, they didn't. Maybe a visit to New York would help him. He sat on a bench at the bus stop next to an aging man with baggy clothes. He inhaled his cigarette deeply and looked off into the distance.

"What you doin' out this late?" he asked Alfred. Alfred thought it was pretty weird to ask a random stranger that question but who was he to talk?

"Going to my friend's house" he explained. The man nodded and examined him.

"You're a good lookin young guy. Don't you got a girl to be with?" a girl...yeah he has one. For now. but he couldn't tell a random stranger that...whatever. Like he'll ever see this guy again.

"Yeah but we got into a fight"

"Ooh that sucks. How long ya'll been together?" Should he tell them the real date? Nahhh.

"Seven years" Alfred lied. The stranger inhaled his smoke deeply.

"That's a long time. Since ya'll been together so long, do ya think it's worth stompin out on her?" he exhaled. Alfred pondered the question. Now that he's had a moment to think about it...the face she made had hurt him. Knowing that it was him who had caused her to remember the pain that she moved past made him hate himself. He wanted to be with her, he needed her. He leaped from his seat and yelled

"Holy Crap! You're right!" he began to run down the street, leaving a very self-satisfied stranger smoking at the bus stop.

* * *

She stirred her hot chocolate slowly. She felt guilty for just a moment, that maybe...perhaps...she did wrong by not telling Alfred what had happened. But this was her secret, she didn't have to tell him if she didn't want to. She didn't have to tell anybody. She didn't do anything wrong...did she? She took a sip of the tea and sat silent. When she heard the phone ring she took her sweet time getting to it.

"H-Hello?" she asked.

"Hey! Like, what is going on?" she heard her dearest friend Poland yell into the receiver.

"Poland...why are you calling so late?" she asked, sniffing.

"I like, have no idea. I just felt like it. Are you like, crying?" Janina considered for a moment if she should tell him. Yeah, he's her closest friend. She can trust him.

"R-Russia...and America" she choked.

"OMG! Don't tell me you caught them fucking?!" he jumped to a conclusion.

"No! It wasn't that!" she yelled.

"Then what is it?"

"You see..."

* * *

Alfred sat across from Janina. She looked down with tears pouring from her eyes. Alfred could feel his world shaken. If such news had that effect on him, imagine what it did to Janina.

"I can see why you didn't want to talk about it" he whispered.

"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean for it to happen!" she sobbed. She remembered the cold touch of Russia's lips, the bruises his hands had made. When she closed her eyes she remembered his violation of her being. The constant violation that wouldn't cease until America had come and saved her. Shame. That's all she could feel telling Alfred of her time at Russia's.

"This wasn't your fault" he comforted.

"I'm afraid...that I'll have to go back" she confessed. For once this loud nation was silent. He didn't blame her and he understood her pain but...he couldn't bring the words to his mouth. He wrapped in his arms, and held her against his chest.

"You don't have to be afraid...I'll protect you. I know that I'm not always there for you but from now on I will be" he promised. She sniffed.


End file.
